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IMPORTANT MEMO: CHS Dress Code Rules Regarding the Armor of God

Dear CHS students, faculty, parents, alumni, and trustees:

It has recently come to my attention that certain members of CHS have been interpreting Ephesians 6 in a much too liberal sense. Thus, I have prepared the following guidelines in accordance with CHS's dress code. If these rules are not followed, detention, suspension, expulsion, and/or execution may follow.

  • Breastplate of righteousness must have a collar and MUST BE TUCKED IN AT ALL TIMES. No contrasting stitching or printed words. Permitted colors: navy, light blue, yellow, gray, burgundy, and white. ABSOLUTELY NO SPAGHETTI STRAPS!
  • Feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace: ok as long as long as they are not sneakers, boots, half-boots, tiva style sandals, and, most importantly, do not leave scuff marks on our floors.
  • Belt of truth is required; it must be solid color.
  • The shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one, is permitted as long as it is "tasteful and not distracting."
  • Helmet of salvation MAY NOT BE WORN except on designated paid dress down days when you can pay an extra 25 cents for the privilege of wearing hats.
  • The sword of the Spirit is strictly PROHIBITED. Students are not permitted to carry weapons of any kind on campus. 

Thank you for your cooperation!

The thrill of being able to wear whatever I want to classes still hasn't worn off ;-)